Farmville Is Going To Be A Movie And So Many People Are Going To See It

I used to work with some people who played Farmville. They’d say things like, “Soandso gave me a cow! Awww, thanks, soandso!” They’d always say it out of nowhere and it would be confusing for a minute and I’d think, “Our coworker GAVE YOU A COW? Do you both own land somewhere? You know how to take care of cows?” But then it would become obvious that they were talking about Farmville. And then somehow I was the foolish one. Anyway those people are definitely going to be so excited about this news, coming from Toy Story writers Alec Sokolow and Joel Cohen. From IGN:

So, yes, we will continue writing movies. We are also working on several new and very exciting opportunities. We’re in conversations with Zynga to do something with one of their brands. Can’t really say too much on that front yet, but ‘Old MacDonald’ didn’t have a factory, if you get our drift.

Ugh, yes we get your drift. The unfortunate thing about this, I think, is that the movie is probably going to be so far removed from the actual idea of Farmville (since the idea is, like, a pixillated farm trading game that exists mainly on Facebook?) that it probably won’t even be that bad. Toy Story was good! I’m pretty confident that the writers of Toy Story can create a fine movie based loosely on the idea of a farm. It’s just too bad that they have to say it’s a Farmville movie because, gross, very gross, please no, gross. I’m not even completely convinced that advertising it as a movie about Farmville is even a better marketing idea than just as a new cartoon thing from the writers of Toy Story. Do that many people care about Farmville anymore? Can you even PLAY Farmville on the new Facebook, or do you just have to watch what all of your friends are listening to on Spotify and then that’s it? (Very good Facebook zing.) If I were in charge of the Hollywood Farmville initiative I would try to think of a way to bring in the non-Farmville people, like these very well thought-out and creative ways:

  • Don’t put Farmville in the title of the movie.
  • Advertise for what seems like two different movies, one about Farmville and one not about Farmville, but in reality they are the same movie that IS actually about Farmville.
  • The tagline can be something like, “A normal cartoon about activities on a farm.”
  • Or the tagline can be something like, “A cartoon to take your family to see.”
  • Oohh, have the characters from Toy Story go on different radio shows and talk about it. Or if any TV shows exist at that point where computer animated characters are guests regularly.
  • Something that makes fun of Angry Birds should be in one of the trailers, but in a timeless and charming way.
  • This can be the title and tagline: Farm Life: “Life ain’t easy on the farm.”

Everyone will see this movie and everyone will love it. I’m hired for this job!