Shut Up, Dude: This Week’s Best Comments

Shut Up, Dude: This Week’s Best Comments

It’s 2023 and hell is freezing over with new Peter Gabriel music, a Frank Ocean show on the horizon, and maybe even Kevin McCarthy getting enough votes for House speaker. Masochism when?

THIS WEEK’S 10 HIGHEST RATED COMMENTS

#10 
Looney Joe
Score: 18 | Jan 1st

Listen, as long as Dave keeps using music to bring people together in whichever way he can – be it covers or horror movies or whatnot – I’ll always have his back. I’d rather be a gigantic dork like him than a Drake or a Lana or a Morrissey.

Posted in: Foo Fighters Announce They Will Continue Without Taylor Hawkins
#9 
crania
Score: 19 | Jan 3rd

Phone Bastard sounds like a cool band that had a minor hit on alternative radio in 1996 and then put out a great sophomore album that bricked commercially so Interscope dropped them.

Posted in: Bad Bunny Explains Why He Yeeted A Fan’s Phone Into The Ocean
#8 
bradinfluence
Score: 19 | Jan 4th

for the first time in four seasons of watching american idol, i voted for a contestant. prior to the season 4 semi-finals, i didn’t really care who advanced; i was just a bystander enjoying the show. but during this top 3, there was a contestant i loved who had previously been in danger of elimination three times, up against a robot (never in the bottom 3) and a rocker (bottom 2 once). in order to secure her advancement, i threw all my votes onto vonzell solomon. but alas, she was sent home in the 3rd place spot (i met her a few years later and took a picture of her instead of with her lol; see below). the winner ended up being carrie underwood, the stiffest performer ever. i’m assuming her stage presence has improved or else i doubt she would have sold 70 million records worldwide. but if i wasn’t a fan of hers back then, it’s definitely hard for me to have any affection for her nowadays, as her face looks like a mannequin and her husband is problematic, sharing transphobic and anti-vax tweets and buddying up with transphobic trump-ettes jason and brittany aldean. while carrie’s worst offense seems to be liking an anti-vax tweet, the company she keeps is very telling.

 

as for her idol coronation song, “inside your heaven” sounds like a by-the-numbers country ballad, typical of an idol winner. she sings it fine, but not as technical as kelly, warm as ruben, or passionate as fantasia. rolling stone just included her on their list of the 200 greatest singers of all-time (ahead of kelly, the only other idol on there), but i don’t think her voice is that special. i haven’t listened to a song of hers since “before he cheats” (which i admit is pretty great), so maybe her voice has taken on new directions. but not on this song. i’m sending it straight to hell and giving it a 3.

Posted in: The Number Ones: Carrie Underwood’s “Inside Your Heaven”
#7 
blu_cheez
Score: 19 | Jan 5th

On the Alternative Side…

Let’s discuss the #1 song(s) from the Billboard Alternative chart.  I’ll align these (virtual date-wise) to Tom’s Hot 100 #1 column as best I can.  We have a two-fer today..

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Song:  Beverly Hills

Artist(s):  Weezer

Time at #1:  One week

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I’m going to continue a mini-trend kicked off in Monday’s discussion about Nine Inch Nails, and will not bother anyone with some sort of 1-2 paragraph summary of Weezer’s history.  The band was already mega famous and (usually) beloved at this point.  I was never a huge fan  – they fell into the “admire more than like” category, so I was not caught up in the fan angst due to the variable quality of the band’s output (but I know it’s a whole thing – perhaps others can step in here).  I’m also surprised it took the band this long to land an Alt. #1 – I would have sworn something like “The Sweater Song” (meh) or “Buddy Holly” (yay!) had done it.

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“Beverly Hills” is the first single from Weezer’s fifth album, “Make Believe”.  Besides the Modern Rock #1, this made it #5 in Canada, #9 in the UK, #10 on the Hot 100, #31 in New Zealand, and #34 in Ireland.

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Where to go here… This is a pretty good song that I really don’t like.  There’s something in the repetition that I find annoying, I hate the “baby” chant in the chorus, and the verses seem to lumber about.   I mean, the vocals are on point for a Weezer track, the band is playing well, and I like the guitar solo, but I was pretty quick to click away from this song back in the day, and I never seek it out now.  I get that this one gets a lot of love, but I can’t go higher than 4/10.

https://youtu.be/q0EpIzx9pi0

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Song:  Best Of You

Artist(s):  Foo Fighters

Time at #1:  Seven weeks

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We’ve covered Foo Fighters in the past.  Let’s check out their next #1…

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“Best Of You” is the lead single from the band’s fifth album, “In Your Honor”.  Besides the Modern Rock #1, this got to #3 in Belgium, #4 in the UK, #5 in Australia, #9 in Hungary, #14 in Europe, #18 on the Hot 100, #20 in Ireland, #23 in Norway, #36 in Italy, and #38 in New Zealand.

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I’m going to keep this one short and sweet, because this song completely rules and is, IMO, Top 10 Foos.  You are possibly a little dead inside if you don’t like this.  An easy 10/10 (RIP, Taylor!)

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https://youtu.be/h_L4Rixya64

Posted in: The Number Ones: Carrie Underwood’s “Inside Your Heaven”
#6 
Logan Taylor
Score: 19 | Dec 30th

I’m going to post the song below

No thanks, I’m good.

Posted in: Ariel Pink And Winston Marshall Went On Tucker Carlson To Promote Christmas Song About Hunter Biden’s Laptop
#5 
eastside tilly
Score: 20 | Jan 1st

2023’s coming up Chad Channing.

Posted in: Foo Fighters Announce They Will Continue Without Taylor Hawkins
#4 
dansolo
Score: 20 | Dec 30th

Here we have a story about a straight cis man being accused of abuse and somehow this leads you to a rant against trans rights and “gender equity” (no fucking clue what you mean by that btw). Anyway, gender affirming care is not “inflicting horrors” on children, please take this misinformed and reactionary garbage somewhere else.

Posted in: Lawsuit Accuses Steven Tyler Of Sexual Assaulting A Minor Decades Ago
#3 
SrCarto
Score: 22 | Jan 2nd

“We Belong Together” was huge. I’m very, very familiar with it, no questions asked. Of course. This is unlike her previous #1, “Thank God I Found You”, which didn’t ring a bell at all. The natural order of the universe has returned.

RIP, Anita Pointer. The Pointer Sisters have a tremendous legacy. Here’s one of my favorites, an exceptionally kinetic hit:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uyTVyCp7xrw

Posted in: The Number Ones: Mariah Carey’s “We Belong Together”
#2 
ShadowMan
Score: 23 | Jan 4th

“Back On The Chain Gang” is one of the definitive 10/10’s for me. Chrissie Hynde pours much inspirational despair into the lyrics and brings the band back on track after the misfortune of loss.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cMOKamtpUA8

Posted in: The Number Ones: Carrie Underwood’s “Inside Your Heaven”
#1 
blu_cheez
Score: 23 | Jan 2nd

On the Alternative Side…

Let’s discuss the #1 song(s) from the Billboard Alternative chart.  I’ll align these (virtual date-wise) to Tom’s Hot 100 #1 column as best I can.  

Song:  The Hand That Feeds

Artist(s):  Nine Inch Nails

Time at #1:  Five weeks

Much like the Beastie Boys, who we discussed several weeks ago, it seems silly to try and summarize Nine Inch Nails (NIN from now on) in a paragraph or two.  Trent Reznor pretty much brought Industrial music into the mainstream and fostered many other bands to find popular support in what had previously been a pretty underground genre.  It’s gotta mean something when you create something that Johnny Cash morphs into one of the greatest covers of all time.

“The Hand That Feeds” is the first single from the band’s fourth album, “With Teeth”.  Besides the Modern Rock #1, this did pretty well, getting to #2 in Canada, #5 in Hungary, #6 in Scotland, #7 in the UK, #15 in Denmark, Finland, and Italy, #17 in Belgium and Norway, #20 in Europe, #28 in Ireland, #31 on the Hot 100, and #36 in Sweden.

This is a rock-solid NIN track – conceived after Reznor emerged from recovery and it hits with a powerful energy and clarity that propels this one out of the depressing funk that was “The Fragile” six years earlier.  This kicked off a renaissance for the band that would soon feed into Reznor’s amazing second career as a top-shelf film scorer.  Really dig this one:  8/10 (it’s a 9/10 when I play it in Rock Band).

https://youtu.be/qn7HvnMJZd4

I’m kind of amazed that this is the first appearance of NIN atop the Alt. chart, but we’ll see this band again soon.

Posted in: The Number Ones: Mariah Carey’s “We Belong Together”

THIS WEEK’S EDITOR-IN-CHIEF’S CHOICE

berger
Jan 3rd

Had to look up the definition of “yeet.” The first example is very appropriate.

yeet

verb [ T ]

  slang US /jiːt/ UK /jiːt/

to throw something with a lot of force:

He just grabbed my phone and yeeted it into the river.

Posted in: Bad Bunny Explains Why He Yeeted A Fan’s Phone Into The Ocean

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