Maybe one day I can forgive Chris Brown for punching his famous girlfriend in the face, because who among us hasn't done that at the Grammy's? I know Tila Tequila has forgiven him, which is the first step. But I don't think I can forgive the line "Reach up in the dresser where them condoms is" because that's just bad grammar. Even worse, you just rhymed "is" with "is." You're dead to me, Chris Brown!
I had about the same size collection as you and I think it's still in my parents' garage. Not only that, I actually own a copy of this video. I rarely played the "game" though. It was a pretty fucking stupid game that wasn't actually very fun. (Spaceprophet, you basically set up a stack of pogs and try to flip them over by slamming a slammer into them, and whoever flips the most wins). As the trend was dying, I remember the various manufacturers caught in an arms race to make bigger and heavier slammers in a desperate attempt to save their livelihoods until they were giant slabs of iron that could be used as weapons.
So, I was at a friend's house and watched this show for the first time even though I didn't know anything about it because I don't have a TV (I know, I know, "I don't even watch TV. I'm READING, faggot." - me), and I enjoyed it even though I felt like I was very explicitly not in any of this show's target demographics. First of all, since I know more about the Videogum meta-happenings than I do about this show, it was like seeing my e-friends on TV. "Hey! There's that girl from that one gif that skinny tie posted out of context that some people got mad about that one time! And Hey! There's Mr. Hausfrau! I know him/her!" were some of the things that I thought. Second of all, I didn't even know this show was a musical? And it was weird to realize this because there weren't any songs for a big chunk of the show and when they started to happen they seemed to take place within the plot's reality but then they started to be fantasies and I was like, "Hey, this is a musical TV show." Good for this show to be able to do that, I say. The creators of Cop Rock are finally vindicated. I also liked the fact that the show hits all the right beats for solid mainstream appeal but is also filled with subtle cleverness such as the post-ironically PC makeup of the cast, or the fact that all the actors look like they were born within a decade of each other, even though they're playing each other's students and teachers and mothers and daughters (Haha OF COURSE that girl was born in 1994! Whatever you say, Glee!), or the idea that a high school library somewhere in Ohio would have a copy of Godard On Godard and a microfiche collection, or the way the teacher and the jock were tossing the football around three feet apart before class (a nod to The Room?). But most of all, I like the fact that I can enjoy and participate in this Glee recap because it is very funny, other Gabe! I should watch TV shows that are recapped on Videogum that I don't know anything about more often.
Awwwww, look at how much fun we have at Steve Winwood's expense, you guys! And some of you want him to leave? That would disrupt the delicate balance of the Videogum ecosystem. His comments are like the manure that beautiful flowers grow in. These guys know what I'm talking about:
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So, within the first few seconds of the trailer, we are expected to believe that Matt Damon is a viable candidate for New York senator, and after a few more seconds we are expected to believe that reality is entirely manipulated by a group of men with telekinesis, like an analog version of The Matrix, and when something doesn't go according to plan, because apparently one of these men was slacking off or something, we are expected to believe that these incredibly powerful men, instead of fixing the mistake with their amazing telekinetic powers, make the conscious decision to reveal themselves and their whole system to this one guy who slipped through the cracks, which somehow jeapordizes their whole charade, because Matt Damon actually has a good chance of standing up to and defeating these almighty superhumans, who, as we have already established, are only in charge of essentially controlling the fate of the entire world by themselves? If anything, this movie makes TOO MUCH sense.
I don't know guys, it's a little rusty now, but he could be the next big thing on Pitchfork. I could see this really catching on if he had access to better recording facilities.
Oh, and also if he had access to better talent and better songwriting ability.
The fokkin prawns are already here and you don't need to ask how to arrest them because they get arrested all the time because they fokkin oppressed jou naai!
It was great when Betty White made that comment about Ana Gasteyer's muffin-eating appearance.
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The past and future of muffin eating in college.
Betty White was killin it with the lesbian jokes. I expected a lot of "old" jokes. I did not expect so many "lesbian" and "vagina" jokes. I guess it makes sense when you consider Betty White has had a vagina longer than most people, so she should be an expert on jokes about them.
Way ahead of you Notsewfast.
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Unfortunately I couldn't find a scabbard to match my manicorn outfit, so I had to forego accessorizing with my Two Handed Great Sword. Ultimately I settled on carrying around my katana, unsheathed, which is not ideal but it will have to do for now.
I thought RunBMC won the caption contest too, although I don't want to call into question Gabe's counting skills. Also, didn't this caption contest counting controversy happen last week too? But also I don't want to steal Mans' thunder, because Mans is great, and I'd like to nominate Mans for Manster's Choice comment of the week, for truly helping out a fellow Manster when she needed it most. Thank you Mans!
Also, we are called Mansters now.
In my experience, opossums aren't aggressive or dangerous, unless they've been bitten by Tyra Banks, probably, but actually they're naturally resistant to rabies. It's just that part of their defense strategy seems to be to look as creepy as possible.
http://i40.tinypic.com/2lubfo.jpg
Your best line of defense in a situation like this is to mask your extreme discomfort behind a feigned smile.
This lady knows what I'm talking about:
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I don't know why EIT decided to edit out the part of the video featuring Gwyneth Paltrow and her kids. That was the best part of whatever this mom documentary was!
I also have a friend who's been shot. I have a picture of him in my wallet. This may seem like a joke but it's actually 100% true! (his picture is on his "business" card)
Nice try, Land Rover, but the internet has already taught me that NO ONE can take advantage of someone with a Great Sword.
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It was a unicorn, but it was poached for its horn, as many of the indigenous people in this godforsaken part of the world hold on to the primitive belief that ground unicorn horn increases muscle mass and sexual prowess. Sadly, the rest of this endangered animal is usually simply discarded.
This is clearly an uncomfortable video to watch, but it's not nearly as bad as the mayhem that ensued after Oprah did the same thing.
"YOU GET RABIES AND YOU GET RABIES AND YOU GET RABIES!!!"
http://img219.imageshack.us/img219/9813/oprah.jpg
Here is a sample of the type of quality information you can find there:
"Ok Ok, I know all these freakin’ pregnancy shit is all over the place but I have already cleared that shit numerous of times on MAINSTREAM MEDIA! So if you missed it, your loss so stop whining about it and get with the dam program! No I am no longer pregnant and after such a traumatic experience with that, you guys scared me shitless to having any children of my own anytime soon! So with that said, boys and girls, eat it up! Cuz MISS TILA will be the Sexy Goddess for quite some time longer! YAY! LMAO! In any case, why am I still under the M.I.L.F. Category?? Cuz I AM THE BOSS AND THIS IS MY BLOG AND THE QUEEN CAN DO AS SHE WANTS!"
Yiiiiikes. Also, what?
That One is right. Although I do believe a comment voting system tends to improve the overall quality of comments because it lets certain people know, "Hey, maybe I'm not as funny or clever as I thought I was." Or if you get 20 upvotes you think, "At least I know 20 human beings out there exerted a minimal amount of effort to acknowledge that they actually read what I wrote, which is better than work where nobody listens to me." But in the end it's really just about having fun, being unproductive, and iChatting with your e-friends.
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