Of course The Bloodhound Gang are a kooky band, so it stands to reason that they’d have a kooky rider. They want to dissuade you of this assumption, as the first paragraph of the document insists “This is a serious document, and part of your contractual deal with the artist.” It goes on to say “this has been very carefully thought out,” and advises not to read their specific deli tray instructions and then provide “Any old meats that can be put on a plate.” Fair enough. So what are the band’s demands, then?

Most of the requests are pretty run-of-the-mill. Sandwich ingredients, sodas, pretzels and the like fill the bulk, though they do ask for a pound of butter, a quart of macaroni salad, and, in one of the more disturbing food requests I’ve seen, “One Jar with 6 Hot Dogs (Frankfurters).” A jar? Oof. It gets pretty specific further down when they request one large package of Skittles, separated by color to appease their obsessive-compulsive bassist. Things get particularly weird in the “Misc” section, where they ask for one refrigerator magnet of local interest, and one small Rhesus monkey skeleton. However, the comical band, who, remember, demands to be taken seriously at the beginning of the rider, parenthetically assures the reader that this is in fact the only non-serious item on the list. Thanks for explaining the joke you included on your serious document, you joke band that demands to be taken seriously!

See the full rider here.