Sorry, Ladies, But Jon Hamm Is A Big Old Goof

Look at this old goof. What a goof! Oh, sure, he looks very handsome when he is wearing a three million dollar suit with his hair superglued back committing sexual assault on another man’s wife in the foyer of a fancy restaurant, but look at him now, goofing it up, goofball-style. You guys want to get some disco fries? That’s what Jon Hamm asked his friends 20 minutes before this picture was taken. “But that’s what we love about him! We love a goofhead!” Ladies, please, do not lie. That is NOT what you love about him. What you love about him is Don Draper’s face and the suggestion that somehow using sex as a weapon can still be fun, or at the very least, beautiful. Fair enough! But do not lie to yourselves and do not lie to me that you want this goof right here. It’s not worth it! Stick with the goof you already have. In fact, go home tonight and remind yourself Hey, that’s MY goof, right there. What do you need with another goof? Please be realistic. Also, pick your jacket up, Jon Hamm, it is dragging on the ground but it is a white jacket, that is just a recipe for GOOFSASTER. (Great word. Glad that worked out.) That dog is like, please, no pictures with the goof. If you tag me in this on Facebook I will untag myself so that no one can find it. That was the dog still, the stuff about Facebook was the dog talking. GOOF IT UP, GOOFBALL! (Photo via TheSuperficial.)