The 2011 Golden Globe Nominees Are Here! (Snooze Button!)

The nominees for the 2011 Golden Globes were announced this morning! Yay? Aww, OK, it’s Christmas, right? YAY! Haha. Just kidding. Sorry, Golden Globes, but even the general enthusiasm and goodwill of the holiday season cannot generate excitement about you. For one thing, you are so low rent. Dress for the awards you want, not the awards you give out, I guess. This is my impersonation of the Golden Globes: “Will someone please help Russell Crowe to his limousine?” At the very least, the Golden Globes are going to be hosted by Ricky Gervais again this year, which is as close to a “good” thing as is possible with this Clown Parade. Still crap, though. And as if the Golden Globes weren’t already a very questionable bargain bin awards ceremony, a few of this year’s nominations are just like, uhhhhhhh. Michael Douglas for Best Supporting Actor in a drama for Wall Street 2? No, David Blaine. Burlesque for Best Picture?! The Golden Globes is just fucking with us now? Even their nomination of Idris Elba for Luther is not enough to make this right (although it is close, because that is a very CORRECT nomination). Oh well. Whatever. Forget it, Jake, it’s the Golden Globes, etc.

Full list of 2011 nominees:


Best Picture — Drama
Black Swan
The Fighter
The King’s Speech
The Social Network

Best Picture — Musical or Comedy
Alice in Wonderland
The Kids Are All Right
The Tourist

Best Actor — Drama
Jesse Eisenberg, The Social Network
Colin Firth, The King’s Speech
James Franco, 127 Hours
Ryan Gosling, Blue Valentine
Mark Wahlberg, The Fighter

Best Actress — Drama
Halle Berry, Frankie and Alice
Nicole Kidman, Rabbit Hole
Jennifer Lawrence, Winter’s Bone
Natalie Portman, Black Swan
Michelle Williams, Blue Valentine

Best Actor — Musical or Comedy
Johnny Depp, Alice in Wonderland
Johnny Depp, The Tourist
Paul Giamatti, Barney’s Version
Jake Gyllenhaal, Love and Other Drugs
Kevin Spacey, Casino Jack

Best Actress — Musical or Comedy
Annette Bening, The Kids Are All Right
Anne Hathaway, Love and Other Drugs
Angelina Jolie, The Tourist
Julianne Moore, The Kids Are All Right
Emma Stone, Easy A

Best Supporting Actor
Christian Bale, The Fighter
Michael Douglas, Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps
Andrew Garfield, The Social Network
Jeremy Renner, The Town
Geoffrey Rush, The King’s Speech

Best Supporting Actress
Amy Adams, The Fighter
Helena Bonham Carter, The King’s Speech
Mila Kunis, Black Swan
Melissa Leo, The Fighter
Jacki Weaver, Animal Kingdom

Best Director
Darren Aronofsky, Black Swan
David Fincher, The Social Network
Tom Hooper, The King’s Speech
Christopher Nolan, Inception
David O. Russell, The Fighter

Best Screenplay
127 Hours, Simon Beaufoy and Danny Boyle
Inception, Christopher Nolan
The Kids Are All Right, Lisa Cholodenko and Stuart Blumberg
The King’s Speech, David Seidler
The Social Network, Aaron Sorkin

Best Original Score
Inception, Hans Zimmer
The King’s Speech, Alexandre Desplat
The Social Network, Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross
Alice in Wonderland, Danny Elfman
127 Hours, A.R. Rahman

Best Foreign Language Film
The Concert
The Edge
I Am Love
In a Better World

Best Animated Feature
Despicable Me
How to Train Your Dragon
The Illusionist
Toy Story 3


Best TV Series — Drama
Boardwalk Empire
The Good Wife
Mad Men
The Walking Dead

Best TV Series — Musical or Comedy
30 Rock
The Big Bang Theory
The Big C
Modern Family
Nurse Jackie

Best Miniseries or Made-for-TV Movie
The Pacific
The Pillars of the Earth
Temple Grandin
You Don’t Know Jack

Best Actor — Drama
Steve Buscemi, Boardwalk Empire
Bryan Cranston, Breaking Bad
Michael C. Hall, Dexter
Jon Hamm, Mad Men
Hugh Laurie, House M.D.

Best Actress — Drama
Elizabeth Moss, Mad Men
Julianna Margulies, The Good Wife
Piper Perabo, Covert Affairs
Katey Sagal, Sons of Anarchy
Kyra Sedgwick, The Closer

Best Actor — Musical or Comedy
Alec Baldwin, 30 Rock
Steve Carell, The Office
Thomas Jane, Hung
Matthew Morrison, Glee
Jim Parsons, The Big Bang Theory

Best Actress — Musical or Comedy
Toni Collette, United States of Tara
Edie Falco, Nurse Jackie
Tina Fey, 30 Rock
Laura Linney, The Big C
Lea Michele, Glee

Best Actor — Miniseries or Made-for-TV Movie
Idris Elba, Luther
Ian McShane, Pillars of the Earth
Al Pacino, You Don’t Know Jack
Dennis Quaid, The Special Relationship
Edgar Ramirez, Carlos

Best Actress — Miniseries or Made-for-TV Movie
Hayley Atwell, Pillars of the Earth
Claire Danes, Temple Grandin
Judi Dench, Return to Cranford
Romola Garai, Emma
Jennifer Love Hewitt, The Client List

Best Supporting Actor in TV Series, Mini-Series, or Made-for-TV Movie
Scott Caan, Hawaii Five-0
Chris Colfer, Glee
Chris Noth, The Good Wife
David Strathairn, Temple Grandin
Eric Stonestreet, Modern Family

Best Supporting Actress in TV Series, Mini-Series, or Made-for-TV Movie
Hope Davis, The Special Relationship
Jane Lynch, Glee
Kelly Macdonald, Boardwalk Empire
Julia Stiles, Dexter
Sofia Vergara, Modern Family