Pajiba is reporting that Hollywood, or as I like to call it, IDEATOWN, because of how it is full of great ideas*, is moving forward with a remake of the ’80s family comedy classic, Don’t Tell Mom The Babysitter’s Dead. Sure. What are we going to do, NOT remake every single movie? Get real. Of course, they are going to have to update it for a younger audience. Like, instead of the babysitter dying, it will be their Nannybot-4000000 running out of batteries. And by batteries, of course, I mean harvestable humans, whose blood is used as the energy source for the robots that now rule a planet consumed by permanent nuclear winter. “100010111011101010101, 1010101111000000010!”**
But if they’re going to remake Don’t Sext Mom The Latte Machine Is Broken, they’re going to need a new tagline! Because if there is one thing the kids of 2010 want, it is taglines. So, what will it be?!
- The Babysitter Was Dead. But She Got Better.
- We Are Not Alone. NOT!
- I Am Already A Little Bored By This Conceit, But No More Bored Than Hollywood, Apparently
Come here, kids. This is where my youth used to be. Now it is just a paved road.