Videogum

That’s Your Videogame: The Bachelor: The Videogame

If there is one thing that people who love to play videogames know about it is the crushing desperation of loneliness and the impossibility of finding true romantic love. THE LEGEND OF ZINGD-YA. Just kidding, nerds. I know that videogames have broken through to the mainstream now, and children are fighting tooth and nail to get the XBOX controller out of their mom’s hands. “Just one more level of Mommy Makeover 2: Space Face!” But a videogame adaptation about a garbage reality show in which some date rapist tries to find love in a sea of plastic surgery enthusiasts? Yuck. Now you, too, can perpetuate the notion that all women really want is to get married, regardless of the circumstances surrounding that marriage, like, even if it’s to a man who is so thoroughly suspect that despite his television-caliber good looks, his effusive charm, and his apparent success in business, he still supposedly can’t manage to find a human being to care about and at the same time thinks that reality TV is a reasonable way to do so, or at the very least to fulfill the tiny dark star of his incredible ego. But you, of course, are also a self-absorbed piece of work with a desire to be thought of as special but an inability to see that this desire is the very thing that makes you plain. SOUNDS LIKE A FUN GAME. Of course, this game isn’t just for the ladies. It’s also for the fellas, because The Bachelor: The Videogame includes The Bachelorette: The Videogame FOR FREE! (Because as we all know, The Bachelorette is a program strictly 4 tha guyz.) It’s crazy how they were able to fit two incredible games on one disc. Miracles, the magic miracles.

Actual trailer for this actual game which is real and which you are going to buy and play and win (and lose) after the jump:

Check it out, guys, I found a cool cheat code: UP-DOWN-LEFT-RIGHT-A-B-SELECT-GUNSHOT. (Via TVSquad.)