Sure, you will be the first to admit that your boyfriend’s former hosting duties on your favorite TV show, Fear Factor, and his current hosting duties on your favorite fighting championship, the Ultimate Fighting Championship, are definitely bonuses. You like a man with ambition and “success.” But his career is not what you find most attractive. No way. The thing that you love about your boyfriend, Joe Rogan, the most–the thing that really gets to the core of your being, and winds itself around your soul–is how he refers to his dick as his “hog,” and how he makes homophobic locker-room videos in which he terrorizes barely-post-pubescent fans by videotaping them and overlaying that video with pig rooting sound effects and shouts of “ride ‘em cowboy.” The thing that you love most about your boyfriend is how he is a self-obsessed, hyper-aggressive, insecure piece of human garbage who treats putting teenagers in their place like it’s his job.
What a great video! And what a clever and necessary way to handle the situation! Your boyfriend is so creative! (Via Defamer.)