The ER Series Finale Drinking Game

After 15 years, the beloved hospital drama ER is broadcasting its final episode tonight. It’s a time to reflect on the show’s award-winning history, but as the New York Times likes to point out, it’s also a time to point out that this show probably should have ended awhile ago:

This medical drama that won 22 Emmy Awards and at its height commanded audiences 30 million strong hasn’t received an Emmy since 2005 and is outshone in the ratings by newer hospital dramas like “House” and “Grey’s Anatomy.”

Aww. This is worse:

All that angst, conscious and unconscious, made for a bracing season. Just as TB patients develop rosy cheeks in the final stages, “ER” at the end recovered the vigor and urgency of its prime.

There you go, ER, congratulations. After 15 years, the paper of record compares you to a tuberculosis patient. You did it! Drop dead.

In any case, as a tribute to this show’s impressive run in a well-worn genre, please enjoy the ER Series Finale Drinking Game:

  • Take a drink if you are 45 years old.

Gotcha! Seriously, does anyone actually watch ER anymore? I mean, I know your mom loves it, but come on. I feel like I’m being dragged to the funeral of a cousin I didn’t know that well, and who the few times I did meet I did not like. Go to heaven, cousin.