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Oh Yes, There Will Be Candy Land

Yesterday, some news broke about Ridley Scott’s movie adaptation of Monopoly. Because that’s a real thing that’s happening. Today, MTV Movies Blog follows up with some details about Candy Land. Because that’s also a real thing that’s happening. (Shit might be getting too real.)

The “Candy Land” script is being penned by “Tropic Thunder” scribe Etan Cohen and directed by Kevin Lima, the helmer behind the surprisingly good “Enchanted.” After throwing together this stellar crew, the film’s exec producer and CEO of Hasbro Brian Goldner dished out an MTV News exclusive first look at the film’s development — details of which have not been publicly discussed before.

So, er, what the heck is this movie going to be about? “Imagine if you took that basic idea of going to a better place, and then allowed the audience to go to that same place together,” Goldner told us. “But then you come to find out, like every other place that’s promised to just be all better and all sweets and candy, you come to find out there’s actually some controversy there as well, that of course the stars of the movie have to solve for.”

Haha. I don’t understand how Brian Goldner, CEO of Hasbro, is not in charge of all the movies. That seems to go without saying. But it turns out he should also be in charge of all the sentences. “Imagine if you took that basic idea of going to a better place, and then allowed the audience to go to that same place together, but then you come to find out, like every other place that’s promised to just be all better and all sweets and candy, you come to find out there’s actually some controversy there as well.” Perfect. He paints mind pictures with his word poetry. I want to go to there. (I don’t want to go to there.)

BREAKING NEWS: Candy Land is a really stupid idea for a movie. I say what no one else has the balls to say!