An Unnecessarily Long And Self-Involved Anecdote To Explain Why Broken Lizard’s The Slammin’ Salmon Looks Hilarious

Before I got this corner office on the top floor of Blogs HQ, I used to work in a cubicle in a horrible industrial park office like from The Office or maybe Office Space. To give you a sense of how bad it was, the building had no windows except for in the miserable cafeteria, and even those windows were so heavily tinted (why? I’m asking, why were those windows tinted?) that sunlight did not come through. Our office shared the industrial park with a run-down whirlyball court, but eventually that closed.

Anyway, in an effort to drum up some collegial enthusiasm and workplace morale, one Halloween they held special Halloween-themed activities in that same decrepit, miserly, lightless cafeteria I have just described. There was a pumpkin carving contest and also a costume contest. Is there anything sadder than people walking a solemn circuit through a worn-carpeted office cafeteria in their elaborate Halloween costume to drum up some support on the applause-o-meter in order to win that gift certificate to the California Pizza Kitchen?

Yes, one thing is sadder than that.

But the highlight of the entire event, for me, were the two MC’s for the event, who were just two dudes from Payroll, or wherever (Accounts Receivable?), who had clearly gone on-line and printed out a bunch of Halloween knock knock jokes, and “a vampire gets stuck on a desert island with a ghost” jokes, and read them stiffly to an audience comprised entirely of uninvested people just trying to avoid doing actual work.

Stay with me, here.

You have to picture this depressing room of collapsible lunch tables, overcrowded like standing room only crowded with industrial park office workers desperate for any reason to get away from their dull jobs, listening to canned jokes from two dudes who peaked in high school as a “warm up” to the suicide inducing costume contest. You have to picture this.

So they would read their jokes, and as you may know this style of joke is generally call and response, as in:

“What did the werewolf say to the mummy when he got his paw caught in the cookie jar?”

And from the dead silence of that nightmare cafeteria, after every single joke’s introduction, you would have heard me shout:

“WHAT?” Or, “WHO?”

Much to my tablemate’s embarrassment. And then, from the dead silence of that nightmare cafeteria after the punchline was revealed you would hear me, alone, laughing at the top of my lungs.

The point of this anecdote was just to give you a sense of where I’m coming from as a way to understand my excitement about a new Broken Lizard movie. Because no one does bra-strap slapping dumb dumb humor quite as well as these guys.

The Slammin’ Salmon trailer, you guys:

Orange you glad I didn’t say banana?