Soulja Boy Sows The Seeds Of His Own Destruction

Soulja Boy is launching a Make Soulja Boy Go Platinum In A Week Project, or something. The extent of the campaign seems to be this impossibly annoying vlog. Because that’s how you do it. You don’t make good music or have a loyal fan base who will ensure the success of your work. You make a vlog, preferably an unbearable one. That’s how Elvis did it, that’s how the Beatles did it, and that’s how Jay-Z does it.

“Did you buy the new Jay-Z album?”
“No, did he make a terrible vlog desperately bugging me to buy it? If only I had seen that.”

Soulja Boy is so aware of his fleeting fame and wealth that this video would almost be sad if he (and it) wasn’t the worst. And despite his best efforts to “get out the vote” on his new album, he’s clearly staring down the gaping maw of irrelevance and eternal one hit wonder status. He says so himself:

Fuck you, Soulja Boy, you killed hip hop. Soulja Boy, eat a dick. Soulja Boy, you single-handedly killed hip hop, fuck you. Fuck you, Soulja Boy, Collipark shoulda never signed your punk ass. That is why.