Sorry, Entourage, But You’re Not Extras

We’ve already addressed some of Entourage’s main problems. Like the problem of how there’s no actual dramatic tension, and the problem of how it’s treading lukewarm water, and the problem of how it’s impossible to really care about any of the characters, and the problem of how it sucks. But one thing we have not seriously addressed is how for a show that’s billed as a comedy, Entourage is not funny. At all. It never has been. Oh, Ari Gold has his moments. It’s funny when he tells Lloyd stuff like if Lloyd doesn’t shut up he’s going to turn his mouth into a glory hole, because Lloyd is gay and it’s funny to threaten hate crimes. But for the most part the show is a brightly lit, stress-free cruise around Beverly Hills in a cherry red Maybach with heated seats. Fair enough.

But Entourage, you need to at least recognize what you are. For a show as boastful and cocksure as you, one would think that you’d be more aware of your strengths and weaknesses. In particular, you are not funny (at all) enough to allow celebrities to make too much fun of themselves in their cameos. It just doesn’t work. Because the end result is that a celebrity who’s pretending to be an asshole just seems like a total asshole. We’re not laughing with them or at them, we’re just thinking about what an asshole they must be. Like Jason Patric in last night’s show. The plot revolved around how Jason Patric was stealing all of Vince’s lines, and how he was physically intimidating, and a jerk. But guess what: I don’t have any preconceived notions of who or what Jason Patric is like in real life, so as far as I’m concerned, this is a documentary about him.

Take this scene for example:

Yuck! Congratulations, Jason Patric, you seem like a real jerk! And how bad does this scene wish that it was in Extras? A: very bad.

Stick to what your good at, Entourage. Or at least what you’re not the worst at. Which is shuffling between various scenes of high class boredom and hugging it out. Bitch.