Jessica Alba Wants You To Vote, Supposedly, Maybe, It’s Kind Of Hard To Tell

Yesterday, I posited that a print ad featuring Jessica Alba in a Hannibal Lecter mask in an effort to encourage voter registration was the scientifically proven least effective means of political activism. I WAS SO WRONG. This VIDEO featuring Jessica Alba SELLING a Hannibal Lecter mask is WAY LESS EFFECTIVE.

Poor Tristan Wilds. He’s lost so much good will in the past couple of months. Also poor my eyes. This video doesn’t even make any sense. You have to buy the muzzle? But it’s a metaphor for not registering to vote? You know that not registering to vote is free, right? Also you can get a muzzle for your baby? But again the muzzle is a metaphor for not registering to vote? You know babies can’t register to vote, right? I hate this thing. I hate this thing so much. That’s the real question: where can we register to vote on how much we hate this thing?