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Sarah Palin Is All The Buzz At Butter And Bungalow 8

Boy, John McCain and Sarah Palin can’t help but get advice today on how not to be so horrible at what they’re doing. Here comes some now! From Lindsay Lohan’s blog:

I’ve been watching the news all morning, like everyone else – and i keep hearing about the issues related to ‘teen pregnancy’- It’s all related to Sarah Palin and her 17 year old unmarried pregnant daughter. Well, I think the real problem comes from the fact that we are taking the focus off of getting to know Sarah Palin and her political views, and what she can do to make our country a less destructive place. Its distracting from the real issues, the real everyday problems that this country experiences.

Lindsay Lohan has been watching the news all morning just like the rest of us, guys. Just sitting in her silk bathrobe eating a cocaine omelet and watching the news on her waterproof floating TV that bobs on the surface of her champagne swimming pool.

So, what should Sarah Palin be focusing on, Lindsay Lohan?

I am concerned with the fact that Sarah Palin brought the attention to her daughter’s pregnancy, rather than all world issues and what she believes she could possibly do to change them-if elected. I get Sarah Palin’s views against abortion, but i would much prefer to hear more about what she can do for our country rather than how her daughter is going to have a child no matter what.

Maybe focus on delivering some words and policy with stronger impact like Joe Biden.

Uh oh. When Lindsay Lohan has given more thought to your campaign strategy than you have, YOU KNOW YOU’RE IN TROUBLE. (I’m going to make a 365-Daily Calendar where every page is a different way in which something Lindsay Lohan does is proof that you’re in trouble and all the proceeds are going to go to Jeff Foxworthy’s mustache. [What?]) Seriously, though, if Lindsay Lohan can not only address a fundamental problem with your political platform, but also express that fundamental problem in almost grammatically correct sentences, then you need to back to the drawing board. And by drawing board I mean place where there are viable vice presidential candidates to choose from who are not ridiculous Saturday Night Live parodies waiting to be written. Oh, and so woefully unacceptable as next in line for the presidency as to be nightmarish.

Ugh Sarah Palin in 2008.