Hancock Was Here, Unfortunately

If you’ll recall, when Steven Spielberg’s A.I. was coming out in 2001 (never forget), there was an innovative piece of viral marketing* in the form of a sprawling online role playing game. Around the same time there was the legendary campaign for the Blair Witch Project. These were both precursors to the current campaign for this summer’s The Dark Knight, with dummy websites, automated phone calls, and hidden bowling balls. No one, of course, has time to actually participate in these things. But, like hospitals, moms, and 24-hour Korean barbecue restaurants, it’s nice to know they exist.

But in the case of Will Smith’s remake of the classic Luke Wilson vehicle My Super Ex-Girlfriend (which was basically the There Will Be Blood of 2006), Hancock, about a lazy superhero, um, maybe they should enroll in the Viral Marketing classes at DeVry Institute for Technology. Because this is not going to cut it.

* I love in that article when it says “perform a search.”

UUUUUUGHHHHHHH. It would be bad enough if it was just this ugly Web 0.5 blog about “Hancock sightings,” but the fact that they fill it with imaginary sycophantic blog comments?

It’s so confusing. Who wants this? It doesn’t appeal to the nerds, and it doesn’t appeal to the jocks. And they’ve been posting entries since December of 2007? Is that someone’s job? Did someone get hired to do that? Perez Hilton was probably a consultant. He was like, “More superdicks on his superface!” and they were like, “That’s why we pay you, for that kind of magic.” Is this who we have to compete with to win a Webby? All that being said, if Hancock had a tumblr this would be a very different post, because that would be hilarious.