Get Ready For A Lot Of Mean Posts About Al Roker, You Guys, Because I Hate Al Roker

Here’s what’s happening in my neck of the woods: I hate Al Roker, who is the worst. He’s the epitome of everything that is terrifying about mediocrity. He’s not too clever, he’s not too ambitious, he’s not too well-dressed. The man is a cypher for everyone who’s ever felt like giving up before they even started. Hey, Chuckles, have some pride in something for once. Have you seen his website? That is the worst website ever. It’s perfect. It says more about Al Roker than all of the Facebook profile status updates in the world.

I’m told that for this to be a professional blog post I have to have a news item so that this post serves a purpose and “offers” the “readers” a “service.” Al Roker is going to be the host of Celebrity Family Feud. That’s probably enough service on that story. That news isn’t even that new. Oh well. Can I go on with how he’s the worst?

I set up a google alert just for Al Roker so that I could hate him up-to-the-minute. Here is an actual conversation from earlier today:

lindsay: i think you should know
lindsay: that al roker announced
gabe: celebrity family feud?
lindsay: yes
gabe: lindsay
gabe: i have a google alert
lindsay: and you should say that you hope he kills himself like that guy
gabe: al roker eats another sandwich and i know about it

I am still trying to get Scott to let us name this site