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Jimmy Kimmel Hates Fags

I might be the only one who doesn’t think that Sarah Silverman’s “I’m Fucking Matt Damon” video love letter to Jimmy Kimmel is the funniest thing. It’s nice when celebrities are able to make fun of themselves, but it’s mostly just getting a cheap laugh off of the word “fuck” for four minutes while celebrating how good looking Matt Damon is (laugh riot). Sure. Fine. This is still funnier, but I’m not in charge of entertainment. Anyway, last night Kimmel released a response video, “I’m Fucking Ben Affleck.”

This is the funniest thing since “I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Hate Crime.” Jesus Christ. I don’t actually think that Jimmy Kimmel or Ben Affleck are homophobic, but the glittery gay stereotypes they rely on to get their laughs certainly are. (Big ups to Perry Farrell for the line “Jimmy’s the one who’s fucking Ben like they’re in prison.” Gay sex is basically rape, you guys, and rape is hilarious. Dude, I read an interview with you in the late ’90s where you paid a stranger to blow you because you wanted to see what it was like getting head from a dude. Chill out.) The audience’s laughter is laced with anticipatory shrieks of just how yucky it would be if these two men actually kissed. And congratulations to Uncle Bass for assuaging any remaining liberal guilt over whether or not it’s OK to laugh at fags. Sure it is. Lance Bass is one!

Jimmy Kimmel. America’s fourth most popular late night entertainer. For good reason.