Shut Up, Dude: This Week’s Best And Worst Comments

“All those fucking thinkpieces about whether it’s a big deal that Beyoncé had a feminist sign behind her are just hot air at a certain point,” Lauren Mayberry says in our new Chvrches cover story. “She’s one of the highest earning musicians in the world and she is a black woman — that is a massive deal. If you were 12 and Beyoncé was up onstage saying to you, ‘You get to do exactly whatever you want to do’ that would be awesome. I wish she said it to me when I was 12.” If you haven’t read the feature yet you could do that today since it’s BeyDay. To celebrate her birthday, Beyoncé’s friends and family dedicated some songs to the singer on beyonce.com. Here’s Jay on Cold Play’s “Yellow”: “This song reminds me of you and I on vacation. ‘Look at the stars, look how they shine for you.’ So many legendary nights.” Barf. Cute! And good luck Taylor welcoming your BFF Beyoncé to the stage! But what would one even get Beyoncé for her birthday? Maybe this blanket? Anyway, I hope everyone, especially Beyoncé, enjoys the holiday weekend.

THIS WEEK’S 10 HIGHEST RATED COMMENTS

#10 LeMonjello | Aug 28th Score:31

Just jokes, guys!

Posted in: Justin Bieber’s New Single “What Do You Mean” Is Really Great
#9

Motas Kah | Sep 2nd Score:32

everything he wrote was true but predictable. everything you wrote was true but predictable. You guys are cut from the same cloth. You should marry each other.

Posted in: Disgruntled VMA-Nominated Director Had A Shitty Time On His Crowdfunded Night Out
#8 reggieohead | Sep 3rd Score:32

I actually think she’s confused about Kendrick’s use of the name ‘Lucy’ throughout To Pimp a Butterfly.

Posted in: Vince Staples: “Shut The Fuck Up Miley Cyrus”
#6 MaadSevere | Aug 28th Score:36

I mean, it’s an ok song. I guess. Are the standards really that low though for pop music that this is considered “really great”. Wait, don’t answer that.

Posted in: Justin Bieber’s New Single “What Do You Mean” Is Really Great
#5 blochead | Sep 2nd Score:36

If somebody somewhere is saying something horrible about TayTay then I’m onboard.

Fucking racist piece of crap.

I’ll read the stupid details later.

Posted in: Director Joseph Kahn Defends Latest Taylor Swift Video Accused Of Racism
#3 Max the King of All Wild Things | Aug 28th Score:38

Someday I’d really like to see a music video for one of these summery, looking up the sky songs to be the complete opposite of the free, fun life sequences we always get. Why not sync an upbeat, hopeful rhythm to images of someone commuting to a job, sitting at his desk and trying to kick up the motivation just to work on something he once loved, realizing over a ham sandwich that he’s sitting alone at lunch again, in fact feels lonely all the time now despite having friends and a girl who digs him for reasons he can’t quite pin down, feels an all pervasive loneliness that ensnares everything inside of him and casts an only-just-perceptible-shade over everything he sees so that when he returns to his work after lunch he finds himself unable to bring himself to do anything but refresh internet pages not even done reloading and stare at the little rotating circle while hoping for a new distraction to allow him just five more seconds of escape, and end with him coming home intent to work on that novel or one of the short story ideas kicking around in his head only for him to find he’s barely got any time in the day left and is too tired to do anything but order Chinese food. Why don’t these songs get a video like that?

Also, “Where Are U Now” is pretty great. This track. . . eh?

Posted in: Justin Bieber’s New Single “What Do You Mean” Is Really Great
#2 crania americana | Aug 31st Score:39

I saw the dreadlocks as more of an homage to John Travolta in Battlefield Earth. Either way, plenty to be offended by there.

Posted in: Chance The Rapper Critiques Miley Cyrus For Wearing Dreadlocks, Saying “Mammy” At VMAs
#1 HartfordTheWhale | Aug 28th Score:46

AND SO IT BEGINS.

SG is all like, “Fuck CRJ, it’s Bieber time.”

Posted in: Justin Bieber’s New Single “What Do You Mean” Is Really Great

THIS WEEK’S 5 LOWEST RATED COMMENTS

#5

Jon Meyer | Sep 3rd Score:-10

In all fairness, you DO have to dig a little harder to get the good rap than in the rock world. Rap is so easy to make, there ends up being an abundance of shitty. In the end, with the proper filter I could make a rap play list that rivals any rock playlist of course.

Posted in: Keith Richards Dismisses All Rap Music
#4

Dave Foster | Aug 31st Score:-11

Yes, everyone must bow down to the terms coined by a feminist film critic, cuz, you know, reasons and patriarchy and misogyny and rape culture and all that.

Posted in: VMAs 2015: The 8 Most Awkward Moments
#3 rouga | Aug 30th Score:-11

I hope she’s pretending

Posted in: Chrissie Hynde Criticized For Rape Victim Blaming
#2 NothankyouKeith | Sep 3rd Score:-12

Old man winter has a lot of people upset. I would attribute his delusional opinions to dementia before I took them seriously……I feel bad for the guy…..Not only is he out of touch with anything that’s transpired over the last 50 years, but he looks like he just crawled out of his casket. And I must agree, there isn’t a person more unqualified to speak on the state of Rap then grandpa wrinkle face here. I do hope he finds placement in a nice home where he can be properly taken care of!

Best wishes – everyone under the age of 65.

Posted in: Keith Richards Dismisses All Rap Music
#1 clydicus | Sep 2nd Score:-13

He re-shot the cover art, why? To remind us how long it’s been since he was relevant?

Posted in: Phil Collins Recreates His Iconic Album Covers For First-Ever Deluxe Reissues

THIS WEEK’S EDITOR-IN-CHIEF’S CHOICE

gobias somecoffee | Aug 30th Score:21

I’d like to listen to this, but i’m ride or die with Tidal.

Posted in: HAIM Are Getting Their Own Beats 1 Show