You can find it streaming illegally in some dark corners of the internet ... but be forewarned the whole season is only four episodes! I busted through all four in one sitting without realizing that was all there was and was filled with some very Luther-like rage.
What makes it so much worse is that Jim has a daughter who's 22. The same age as Emma Stone! And she has a kid, so he is a grandpa! He clearly thinks he's being funny but he needs to be making videos professing his love of Werthers, not young starlets.
I would like to nominate The House of Yes, because of Tori Spelling and Freddie Prinze Jr and incest and yuck. But I don't want Gabe to have to watch it, or anyone in existence to watch it, really, so instead I will nominate Wanted. Because Loom of Fate.
I knew I was going to love this story as soon as the eyewitness said, "I just heard this like faint screaming?"
And then the reporter went into the hole in her pink suit! A++ news story.
Everyone who remembers getting Land Before Time hand puppets and Back to the Future III super futuristic sunglasses from Pizza Hut can join me out here on the front porch of our rest home for some Werther's.
So what's the next step? Do you carve the squid? I don't understand how you go about just eating a whole squid. Also, is the squid resting on a bed of vitamin E supplements? That's waaaay too much vitamin E, guys! This is shaping up to be a really shitty meal.
In the grand scheme of things Chet Haze is incredibly harmless, and yet I just want to punch him so badly! Just punch him right in the gut. And then I kind of want to punch Tom Hanks too, just for enabling him. And for making Larry Crowne! Why does something so insipid fill me with so much rage? PUNCH.
"You're the one who wrote 'every kind of mustard' was on my shopping list!"
"And yet you still don’t have the one I’m thinking of. It’s red. It says “ketchup” on it. ... Oh. I hear it. That’s on me."
Andy Daly is the best and deserves his own show! Why are they pulling fossils out of the Old Not-Funny Comedian closet when a perfectly good Andy Daly is sitting RIGHT THERE? Ugh.
There's something about the faces Mike makes that make me want to crawl up the walls. What is going on with his face? His sexist, sweaty face.
Signed,
Reluctantly Team Blaise
"If you loved Julia and Tom's sizzling chemistry in the Charlie Wilson's War trailer, you will definitely love it again in this one, and by sizzling chemistry I mean barf and also definitely the reason I never watched Charlie Wilson's War."
I wish someone would hire me to write blurbs for movies.
Good God. Is the genius high school drama director responsible for this still somewhere laboring in obscurity when he/she should have achieved an EGOT by now?
Louise is my favorite! We quote her a lot at my house, especially her pre-performance speech from the dinner theatre episode ... "Shhh, shhh, I'm sorry, baby, shhh, you know how I get before a big show ..."
Love.
The Paul F. Tompkins recaps on Vulture are also great ... I read them even though I don't watch AI because I have too much free time on my hands, apparently.
I don't know if I agree with Gabe that Mike is Blaise's only real competition ... Antonia and Carla can be inconsistent, but they are also capable of knocking it out of the park. Plus, maybe this is my ovaries talking but I am rooting for a woman to win this show? Or maybe it's just my hatred of Richard's hair talking.
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