I reeeally hated Party Down. The 'theme' seems to be "It sucks being an a struggling creative in LA" but then ALSO "if you're NOT a struggling creative in LA then you're a fucking loser." It felt like an obnoxious naval gazing indie movie with the production values and jokes of a web show that only shoehorns in some comedy so it's not just a show about a bunch of whiney jerks.
It suddenly made me realize there's this whole genre of "mockumentaries about people with delusions of grandeur where characters struggle to control how they look to the viewer" ie, The Comeback, Drop Dead Gorgeous, Pilot Season, Summer Heights High, and of course The Office. And I LIKED all of those things. But each time they did one of those kinds of jokes in Parks and Recreations, I realized I had seen it before in a similar type of show. And I didn't laugh. ALSO, I feel like Amy Poehler isn't as good as Steve Carell as making her self-deprecation feel genuinely accidental. She kind of feels like a hammy improv sketch character who is taking it down a notch for the sake of the genre. But whatever the dude she slept with is hot and so is the broken-legged boyfriend, I'll watch another episode.
Hedgehogs are illegal in NYC too, and I own one. Just gotta have a vet who can keep that shit on the DL. She's not very good though :( "How do I open it?"
I hate having to describe a video in conversation. Since getting my iPhone last I've used it twice in conversation to show a video that someone else was describing, and managed to come out of it not looking like a goober. Yay for the YouTube application.
How sad is that one lady who kept screaming about how much she looks like Jessica Simpson. 1) You know Jessica Simpson's face that well? Get a life! 2) Even if someone actually was a genetic double to Jessica Simpson it's still obnoxious to flip your lid like that. 3) Say you're right and you did just meet a celebrity, WTF, that's still an embarrassing reaction.
Whoa he's way sexier as a vlogger than he is as a movie star. As a movie star you're all like "So what? Everyone's hot in makeup." but as a vlogger you're like "Who is this old man talking to the camera? I kinda wanna do him."
That movie was terrible. But all of that aside: "...horror of Nixon abolishing term limits"
What!? That wasn't even a part of the movie. It was like, a sight gag. "Nixon is president for a third term, ha ha." It's not like it was a moral debate within the movie! Shut up, Watchmen.
I'm going to debate with my friends about the morality of mutating purple bob cats, and the profound utilitarianism displayed in knocking over the water tour to put out the fire, and the stark contrast between capitalism and socialism in that one scene where they said the word "socialism," remember?
This movie is for nerds who think they're smart but aren't actually smart. This movie is for Milhouse Van Houten.
Lars and the Real Girl is weird like that. I saw the trailer and I was like "I would see that." and then I saw it for 20 bucks at Virgin and was like "Sure why not." And then I watched and was like "Well that was everything I was hoping would happen based on the trailer." BUT SOMEHOW there is this lingering regret in my head. Like maybe if I DIDN'T see it I could've pretended that maybe it was the one that got away, and it was actually an AMAZING movie. I feel like I ruined it by waiting too long to go from 'anticipation' to actually seeing it.
ALSO, in my sophomore year in high school, my computer science teacher told me I'd like American Splender, and I was like "sure okay." And then a few years later I saw it in a bargain bin and bought it. But I still haven't watched it. That movie is 6 years old now. I'm kind of afraid to watch it. BUT ALSO, I feel constantly mentally taxed by it, like a salami slicing scheme, American Splender is slowly robbing me of hours of my life spent thinking "I still need to watch American Splender" which I could've probably recuperated by just watching it by now. But I will never watch it. Ever.
I'm going to see this and pretend T3 never happened. Because I didn't see T3. Because it shouldn't have happened. Terminator has always been about John and Sarah Connor, not Arnold Schwarzenegger. (It wasn't even the SAME Arnold Schwarzenegger, and it had a sexy female robot that was basically just Girl Wolverine from Xmen 2. Seriously, fuck that last Terminator movie)
I love how each time they keep begging the question "How does he pay for it?" they just keep telling you "Out of his own pocket!" what is he a millionaire? HOW DOES HE PAY FOR IT!?
The best part is the commenters arguing over whether or not CO2 is bad:
"CO2 is a gas of life every bit as much as oxygen. FACT: Almost every plant on this planet grows faster and healthier with MORE CO2 .. not less. So people who want less CO2 call themselves 'green'? BS! The average PPM of CO2 on earth over 100's millions of years was FAR HIGHER than now. To plants, right now the climate is CO2 IMPOVERISHED. One more fact that enviro nitwits cannot reconcile is, if human CO2 causes warming, WHY has earth cooled since 1998 while CO2 has kept rising?"
Apparently the Hannah Montana show is a sitcom on the Disney Channel about a "regular girl" who goes to high school and has boy problems and stuff, and she has to keep everyone from finding out that she's SECRETLY a celebrity with a wig and a fake name. Like Sabrina the Teenage Witch except instead of being a witch she's secretly Hannah Montana. I mean. I've never watched it, it's just, y'know... the zeitgeist... I'm just trying to be informative here! (ALSO, if she has to choose, doesn't that mean the show ends?)
Their TV is HD but they're still using the same rabbit ears, which would be connected by a coaxial cable. You can also see the empty HDMI slots on the side, maybe?
I also really liked Waiting. But it's worse than you thought: according to IMDB Justin Long makes a cameo as Dean, AND ALSO, they invalidate the entire point of the first movie by showing you his life is still shitty despite his choice to leave, and make jokes at his expense.
I feel like Stefan is the cocky arrogant jerk who opposes the Bad News Bears or the Mighty Ducks or whatever, I just want him to lose despite the fact that he's TECHNICALLY the best. I want Carla or Fabio to win. But ESPECIALLY not Hosea.
Also, notice how Hosea got huskier since they filmed? Getting dumped will do that to you. Haha. I wonder if he told her before he got home or let her find out from the TV.
I've only actually been watching it since this season (I tried watching the DVDs and mehhh) and I'm pretty sure I've been caught up ENOUGH from recaps and stuff.
ANYWAY. One recurring theme on the show is "Things are supernatural! No they're not." I don't think the island is sentient or anything, but it's become pretty obvious now that someone is guiding their time travel. My guess is that it's Future Locke, time traveling everyone so they'll all come back to the island. ALSO? Those ghosts? They're not ghosts. They're dead characters who have been UNKILLED by taking their dead bodies and reversing time (it happens!) and then they travel through time and space to give people meaningful messages so they all know that THEY HAVE TO GO BACK.
ALSO, that chick that's being dying for a month? There's probably going to be a scene where her and Jin meet in a tangent time jump that we never saw. Because it wasn't like the island was speaking through her, it was like Jin knew she spoke Korean because they had already met (even though we're supposed to think they haven't).
Goddamnit I'm talking about Lost. I just Lost the game.
Sigh, when I was scrolling through my RSS reader I saw the picture for this article and it activated my 'hot guy' turn signal. Then I realized it was Larry The Cableguy and I felt gross. This isn't the first time this has happened. Fuck him.
ALSO how are they getting him on child pornography charges if he's in high school and all these kids are in high school too? ALSO who sends naked pictures to random strangers on Facebook? ALSO, "release the photos to the school", what? ALSO, given the homophobia of high school students, who is would ACTUALLY rather suck dick than have 'the school' find out you sent naked pictures to a chick? ALSO, 300 years in jail?
Maybe it's because I didn't have sex in high school (because I'm gay, like this kid, and it's impossible to have gay sex in high school without employing hijinks) but this kind of sounds like only orange-level despicableness that's being sensationalized and outraged by people who are just disgusted by the fact that he's a dude.
I mean if it was the exact same crime and it was say, a fat chick posing as an attractive chick, would it even go to court? I'm not saying he shouldn't be in trouble, I'm just saying this story's kind of getting a "c'mon!" out of me.
Hey, you know what was barely mentioned in this post? Privileged. Privileged is awesome! It's about a scrappy college graduate from a broken home who gets a live-in job tutoring these twin billionaire orphaned teenager heiresses. The title SEEMS to be about how it's about rich girls, but after watching it for more than a few episodes, you slowly realize that the billionaires are actually the ones who are morally well-adjusted and that the scrappy poor girl is a fucking cunt who is taking her fucked up family for granted, because some people don't even have families!
It's like a standard fable on morality and classes in society, except it just HAPPENS to be that the poor girl is the cunt and the rich girls are awesome. ALSO, the poor girl feels like she's "the good guy" but she's actually really really annoying and EVERY character on the show sort of hates her. She's like Marisa Cooper if everyone hated her on the show as much as everyone hated her in real life. ALSO the actress who plays her is totally aware of her role and is SUCH A PERFECT CUNT it's amazing.
Anyway it's only got like 3 episodes left and it'll only be picked up for a second season if Reaper fails. So, watch the last 3 episodes but don't watch Reaper! I'm viral marketing you guys so a show I like gets picked up. Everyone please viral that Privileged is good.
POSSIBLE EXPLANATION: Their time travel isn't organic, but is being specifically guided by someone, who also picks and chooses what they take with them. Wherever they show up (sigh WHENever they show up) is always plot-relevant. Cloak lady said they had to SAVE THE WORLD, so it's possible everything they're being shown now is necessary for them to save the world. Didn't Locke go to a different time than everyone else at one point? So if they someone is picking and choosing who goes where (when) then they can also pick and choose what goes where (when).
Like in Chrono Trigger, how each era they visited is relevant to Lavos because their time travel was being guided by Schala, who got trapped between time by Lavos. Lost is such a JRPG.
Hey, can we talk about True Beauty for a second? My boyfriend forces me to watch a LOT of shows, that show included, and I got SO MAD after four episodes. It's such a shitty unawatchable low rate show that I can't even talk to anyone about this. But while no one was watching it, SOMETHING DESPICABLE HAPPENED.
There was this contestant, CJ. He was black and used to be fat and just lost a bunch of weight and looked good, but they casted him poorly because he was basically a normal guy, where everyone else on the show was like weird shallow blonde archetypes. So you think he'd NATURALLY win right?
In each episode they have all of these little hidden "good person" challenges (picking up litter, comforting a crying crew member, helping a PA open a door with coffee, etc) and CJ won EVERY SINGLE ONE of them. This means one of two things: CJ is a morally upstanding individual, or CJ is smart and he FIGURED OUT THE GAME and realized that the obvious set ups were obvious set ups.
But because each episode picks the lowest 2 by SUBJECTIVE beauty, they can basically put whoever they want in the lower 2, so as soon as it became clear that he had figured it out (or had morals) he started getting chosen for the bottom 2 in every episode. Also, the bottom 2 have to go to the Hall of Beauty, and on their way there's always a hidden moral challenge set up for them, supposedly how they fare in that moral challenge is what ACTUALLY picks who is eliminated.
They finally got rid of him last episode, on the grounds that the photo they chose for him wasn't "connecting" enough with his old lady model (even though we SAW a ton of photos at the old lady photo shoot where they were totally connecting). And the challenge was to see if he'd help a crying girl find his mom. They show the other guy comfort the girl, and then they show CJ walking PAST the girl, and the judges looking disgusted. Okay? They made that up. They edited it to make it look like he walked past and then cut in a shot of the judges being unhappy. When they eliminate him they're like "Even though you helped the girl (flash back to him actually helping her) your photo still really sucks, so we're getting rid of you... but that's not all, we're also secretly judging your personality!"
Then they show a montage of CJ getting mad at the show for calling girls ugly, and getting angry at how rigged and superficial everything is. They're claiming that his ugly personality was revealed through the fact that he was getting mad about how SUPERFICIAL the show's premise was. The only ACTUAL bad thing he ever did, was during one of the games he lied to someone on the street to win the game. But, hello, the show is lying to people too!
The show lied worse than CJ and was more superficial than CJ. What's worse is that the judges remained on their moral high horse the entire time they fake-evicted him. Non-stupid shitty reality TV editors would've pulled a Joe Schmoe 2 and had some kind of contingency plan for a contestant 'figuring it out', but they just fakely got rid of him. And what's worse is that the whole show was blatantly revealed to be even more shallow than the people it's supposed to be exposing. Whatever. If anyone deserves to be sent to the Hall of Beauty it's the PRODUCERS. FUCK YOU TRUE BEAUTY.
I always view these types of propaganda under a lens of "how is this all symbolically about homosexuality."
ALSO, speaking of GodTube, did you know they used to have a "Random" button that would take you to a random video? It's since been removed, presumably due to irony.
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