Have you ever been to one of those websites where a chick pops up and talks to you about how great the site is while you furiously hunt for the X button? Those chicks don’t come from nowhere — it seems they come from the exciting worlds of local news and/or beauty pageants, and they’re all available for hire from the site websitetalkingheads.com, where each one makes her awkward, pre-rehearsed pitch in hopes companies will pick her to annoy their very own customers. Here are a few of my favorites. Which one should we pick?
Chantel, who doesn’t know what to do with her hands:
Amy, who actually makes a world peace joke:
Tiffany, who is also a high school basketball official, so watch out for the creepy oversexual way she says “watch out.” Also, no traveling!:
Brandy, who was a reporter…in the Army! OF ALL PLACES!:
Oh, who are we kidding. Tiffany gets all the jobs. (Thanks to Louis for the tip!)