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Twilight Actor Can Be In The Next Movie If He Promises To Get Hotter

Big news, Twilight fans (There have to be some, right? One of my best friends is a Twilight fan): Taylor Lautner, who played the gentle, kind, puppy-eyed, loving, sweet-hearted, harmless, strangely-sharp-toothed-but-nobody-ever-mentioned-it Native American childhood friend of Bella in the first Twilight, has finally been allowed to resume his role in the second movie, New Moon. But he has to work out and get hotter so he can play a believable were-love interest. Reuters reports:

The problem with recasting the 16-year-old Lautner for “New Moon” was a physical one, because in the book series Jacob Black bulks up and grows about a foot taller between the first and second book. But Lautner has said he is working out for the role, and maybe he can count on a teenage growth spurt.

No pressure or anything, Taylor! This is just like high school, and Taylor’s the guy in ninth grade who’s “Too nice,” and then returns from summer vacation suddenly hot and is never, ever, ever, nice again. You can do it, Taylor! (Also next summer’s TMZ story: ‘Twilight’ Actor Busted For Steroids.)