Look, we’ve been good, right? Haven’t even mentioned her since February! Tough because, ya know, there wouldn’t even be a Stereogum if it weren’t for Ms. Spears. But there was no way around posting this untitled track that’s spanning cyberspace today. ‘Cause it’s just fucking terrible. Brit’s feeling kinda blue in this moaning slow-jam, getting pharyngial with her “Why did you desert me”?s, complete with one-way Alicia Keys styled phone conversation (“Hey baby … what time you gonna get home? … *sigh* …”). You get the picture. In fairness, this popped up as an uncredited, untitled track on Ryan Seacrest’s radio show this morning, so maybe it’s just a demo. Even if so, though, it’s broken beyond repair. What? Is that a metaphor for our darling Brit’s career? Come now. We haven’t been that snarky in years!
Listen at Hypem, and then wash your ear canals out with soap. And we figured what better place to look for a recent Brit pic than britneyspears.com, so here ya go! And while you’re at it, name her new album. She wants you to.