Father John Misty Unveils Kanye-Inspired Life Of Padre Merch

#1 Troll Daddy Father John Misty debuted new merch today on his online shop, including some Pablo-inspired apparel. The long sleeve blue “Life Of Padre” shirt (pictured above) goes for $40, and the T-Shirt below goes for $25, which is like, half the cost of Kanye’s official merch.

Father John Misty Unveils Kanye-Inspired Life Of Padre Merch

There’s also a “Life Of Padre” baseball cap and hooded sweatshirt for sale, but the most curious new merch item has nothing to do with Kanye. It’s a pair of rose quartz crystal earrings that may or may not have been cut from the same mineral FJM allegedly stole from Moon Juice pioneer Amanda Chantal Bacon. The earrings cost $45 dollars and are described as follows:

Extremely Limited Edition earrings from Father John Misty.

You do want the energy of these definitely not-stolen crystals.

These earrings are of the highest quality, offered for those with only the most discerning taste. Privately sourced by Father John Misty in Los Angeles, each stone is meticulously cut from recently-acquired rose quartz crystals in Josh Tilman’s private collection.

FJM

… Suspicious.

Sidenote: has anyone seen Father John Misty’s diamond-encrusted Yves Saint Laurent parakeet brooch? He’s been looking for it in our comments section.