Shut Up, Dude: This Week’s Best Comments

Shut Up, Dude: This Week’s Best Comments

Big week for Pharbs as we learned Phoebe Bridgers will be on new albums from the National, Shame, and boygenius (her group with Lucy Dacus and Dave Grohl). Last night Bridgers shared her one-time nemesis David Crosby’s “Orleans” on Instagram. One of my faves too. R.I.P. Croz.


Score: 18 | Jan 13th

Meanwhile in Canada…

Those crazy sales-only non-chart charts in Canada continue through 2006, but worth noting this monster hit from our good friend Madonna. Riffing on ABBA’s “Gimme Gimme Gimme,” Madonna’s “Hung Up” was #1 in Canada from December through April (with a brief two-week interruption – Canadian Idol winner Melissa O’Neil’s “Alive”?) for a total of 15 weeks. Canada was not alone; it topped the charts in 41 countries, a world record, and rightfully so. As the kids say, it’s a banger. It only reached #7 on the Hot 100. Come on, America, what’s wrong with you!

Posted in: The Number Ones: D4L’s “Laffy Taffy”
Score: 19 | Jan 13th

Line of the Day:

“In New York, heads looked at “Laffy Taffy” the way English villagers might’ve once looked at Viking longboats.”

Posted in: The Number Ones: D4L’s “Laffy Taffy”
Score: 20 | Jan 13th

Using Laffy Taffy in a sexual context is at best, a stretch.  (Yes, I did that purposely.)  And a man comparing his member to a Jolly Rancher makes sense texture-wise (Jolly Rancher is the hardest of all candies afterall), but the size of the candy does not work out in the man’s favor.  The Chick-O-Stick reference isn’t bad.  I was thinking about what other candy would make sense as a euphemism for sex, sexual organs or sexiness, based strictly on the names alone, and here are some possibilities- 


Milky Way




Sugar Daddy (of course)

Sugar Babies


Big Hunk


Hot Tamales



Atomic Fireballs


Wazoo (yes, that is a candy bar that exists)

Why did I take the time to do this?  I guess I wanted to contribute in some way to the conversation on today’s #1, and it’s what I’ve got.Yes, it’s come down to this.

Posted in: The Number Ones: D4L’s “Laffy Taffy”
Score: 22 | Jan 14th

Some are asking “who is limiting the availability of her new music?”

The answer is simple:

Sky’s the limit.

Send tweet

Posted in: Sky Ferreira Addresses New Music Holdup: “This Is Beyond Fucked Up”
Score: 22 | Jan 13th

Five years! Amazing.

Turns out that it’s true: Time flies when you’re having fun.

Atta boy, @TomBreihan.

Posted in: The Number Ones: D4L’s “Laffy Taffy”
Score: 23 | Jan 15th

Who knows what’s going on behind the scenes here, but in situations like this I always wonder what their day to day looks like. Like does Sky wake up, call her manager to ask if she can put the album out today, get a no and then just play skyrim the rest of the week?

Posted in: Sky Ferreira Addresses New Music Holdup: “This Is Beyond Fucked Up”
Score: 26 | Jan 14th

I think I’ve told this joke before, but:

Q: What kind of music do windmills like?

A They’re huge metal fans.

Posted in: Cate Blanchett Asks Slipknot Fan Margot Robbie If Anyone Actually Likes Metal
Tom Breihan
Score: 30 | Jan 13th

Aaaay, thanks everyone! And thanks for reading, commenting, and turning this into a whole thing. I love doing this.

Posted in: The Number Ones: D4L’s “Laffy Taffy”
Score: 32 | Jan 13th

Got a message back from the Big Thief team today inviting my high school students to sound check + conversation. Hoping I can get trip approved by our school system. And they are offering to chip in $500 to help with transportation. I don’t always need my fave bands to also be good people but it’s cool when it works out that way.

Posted in: Shut Up, Dude: This Week’s Best Comments
Score: 81 | Jan 13th

By the way, this Saturday will mark the fifth anniversary of when Tom started writing this column. Going from 1958 to the start of 2006 in music in 60 months is pretty impressive to me. Let’s give him a hearty salute for what he’s done and has left to accomplish here.

Posted in: The Number Ones: D4L’s “Laffy Taffy”


Jan 16th

I sure hope that Mark didn’t actually write those lyrics and use the ChatGPT as pretext to get Nick’s thoughts on them.

Posted in: Nick Cave Responds To ChatGPT Attempt To “Write A Song In The Style Of Nick Cave”

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